Currently I’m the head coach of my ten year old son’s soccer team. We’re having a great time so far, and I think the boys are learning a lot. Yeah, I’m a good coach. One of the team moms is my assistant, and she is great as well. The league has been practicing for about two weeks in preparation for the upcoming season. Before that was the league draft, where all the coaches got together and picked our teams for the year. There is a lot of time and energy being spent by the parents to get the season rolling and manage the teams and league. This happens all over, every season for every sport. Hundreds of people volunteer their time so the kids can have sports/clubs/activities in which to participate.
Throughout my time as a volunteer coach I’ve encountered a complete gambit of adults who also are putting in their time. Most are good people, with good intentions. Some are great. Some just plain suck.
I wonder sometimes about the (mostly) men that are either obviously in over their heads, are just not good at coaching, or are outright abrasive and disruptive to the kids. I used to think there needs to be someone who can step in and stop these dolts from being in charge of a team of young kids. But then I’d think, we’ll at least they had the heart to say yes when asked to coach. They agreed to give up their time when most others said no. That held a lot of water for me for a long time. But no longer.
It’s NOT enough to give of your time. If you’re not good at it, please stay away. Volunteerism is a wonderful thing, and I applaud someone who wants to give of themselves in some capacity. But you need to know in what capacity that should be.
I’ll use my son’s lacrosse coach from last season as an example. It’s my understanding, and confirmed by several others that are closer to him, that this man has been banned from coaching two other sports in our town. WHAT!?! Then who is the puckered ass who put this man in charge of a youth lacrosse team?? As I, and other parents watched the team “progress” through the season more and more of asked each other if we knew much about the coach. It turned out that most of us did not. Suffice it to say that the coach was an unmitigated dickhead. On the first day of practice, I introduced myself and offered to help the team in any way needed. He said “Great,” and walked away. That was the only word he spoke to me for sixteen weeks. Dickhead. This was a team of 10-11 year old boys, most of which had never played the sport before. We watched as he yelled, stomped, demanded and generally taught the boys…well, I’m not sure what he taught them. I think the only reason we didn’t speak up is that we were all new to the sport as well and thought maybe that’s how you coach lacrosse. It was bad enough that my son, and several other boys, said they would play again next season if he was planning to coach the team. Oh well, we’re done with him now.
I hope that illustrates my point that just because you are “generous” enough to accept a volunteer position doesn’t mean that you’re good enough. Don’t get caught up in smelling your own shit. Nobody thinks they are bad at coaching a youth team. But guess what, SOME OF YOU SUCK!! It doesn’t take too much of a genius to look around at others in comparison to yourself and realize, “Wow, those guys are WAY better at this than I am. Maybe I should rethink this position.” Now, that’s a terribly hard pill to swallow. I’m not sure I could do it. Of course, the point is moot since I’m generally pretty great at stuff.
So, fair readers, especially you with children…when you look around town at the folks involved in your children’s activities, don’t let them off the hook too easily. I know it’s nice that they want to help, but that shouldn’t be the end all. Always remember, just because someone can do something (or says they want to) does not always mean that they should do that thing. If you are going to volunteer to be involved, then BE involved. Take some time to learn about what you will be doing, and do it well…better than well…because the youngsters (and their parents) you will be in charge of are looking to you for guidance and support. Your time is not enough. A little bit of your soul should get in involved as well.
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