I
have learned a very long list of things by raising two kids. I can't say
it was unexpected, but some of them came as a surprise. One that I've
come to realize recently is that it's OK to stray from accepted preconceived
paths or ideas.
As
I grew up the accepted norm was school, college, white collar. Pretty
straight forward. I always enjoyed being at school, but not so much the
actual schooling. But since I never really considered a different path, I
soldiered forth as needed...to a point.
My
two, now teenage, boys as so similar in many ways and SO, SO unique as
well. That was weird to get used to at first, but I grew to relish
it. The older is following what I'd consider the more traditional path
that I assumed to be on at his age. He was very studious in high school,
is now attending college, studying engineering, and knows that is what he'd
like to move into after getting his degree.
The
curve ball here is my younger son. He is very creative and intelligent,
which is to be expected...cause, let's face it, look at his dad. However,
he is not a lover of school, doesn't necessarily want to attend college, and is
still scanning the horizon for that inspiration of what to do "when he
grows up." It took some getting used to, but I have found that I'm
completely OK with all that.
It
was a very hard thing to step back and let one of my kids choose the path that
I feel like I would never have considered for myself or for him. But I
think the lesson is very well learned. He has taken a bit of control of
where he wants to go, and I feel like he'll be happier and more prosperous in
the end for doing it.
As
parents, as flexible and cool as we all think we are, the urge to get the kids
on a familiar path is nearly overwhelming. It's been drilled into all of
us that there is a safe, effective, and normal way to grow up and into and
career. At fifty, I am finally and truly comfortable with the fact that
that does not need to be the case.
And
maybe more importantly, I am proud that he has had the courage to not toe the
line. I know it's not scaling Everest, but to a teenager it is a daunting
task to not follow the herd. The herd is comfortable but not always
right. Take the path less travelled (yep) if it calls to you, and do what will lay out your
best future. That could make all the difference.
